Just another day in perdition

I bought two office plants last week. I don’t know about anyone else, but I like keeping a small plant in my office just to remind myself that there is SOMETHING alive in the office besides me.

Well, sure, TECHNICALLY there are 20-plus other people inhabiting other cubicles in the room, but I’m not altogether certain some of those bodies are still warm. I’m not a big CSI fan, but I’m sure Grissom and Company could get a work-out here. Most causes of death would no doubt be various degrees of boredom or complications of work-induced high-blood pressure but I’m sure any pathologist worth his salt could find at least one suicide, a couple of murders and three negligent homicides. And that’s just this week.

God knows I love my job.

So, why, one may wonder, would I bring in yet more unsuspecting prey by hauling office plants into this pit? Even if they are cacti equipped with three-quarter-inch spikes for self-defense? Frankly, I was lonely. Jeez, if my only comfort is blogging to total strangers (yeah, like anyone’s actually reading this drivel) shouldn’t that give you some kind of clue to my desperation?

Cut me some slack. I was honest with my new cubicle companions. Straight off the bat and out of the bag, I sat them on the desk and greeted them with a hearty “welcome to hell!” I got a distant “thanks” in response, which spooked me until I realized the voice came from a couple of cubicles over. Another warm body! Life in cubeville is improving already.

“It is not necessary to change. Survival is not mandatory.” -Unknown